The Journey

 

Before I write anything I need to say my feet are on the ground and I know I still have a LONG road ahead of me, I know I will have to walk parts alone, I am happy in the knowledge I will have loved ones, friends and virtual friends on the journey with me

I came from a hellish Childhood, to a terrible teenage time, to becoming a terribly confused young Adult who was a Dad at 18, I was gifted a partner and a family as time moved on, I had it all. Aged 30 my life changed in more ways I can tell, but also came pain, depression, suicidal thoughts, and a lack of wanting to be better, I was popping prescription pills like they were sweeties (Candy in the USA) I was in a bad place, this was after I had this taken from me, I caved in, I gave up http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2013/06/08/the-football-story-i-never-told/ I was as good as gone

Then 8 months ago, after 18 months of writing this: http://www.broowaha.com/articles/17147/glasgow-celtic-start-league-campaign-with-2-1-win or similar, I stopped doing that and started to blog about me, just me, where I was in my mind, the pain, how I couldn’t cope, this was my first few blogs

http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2012/07/31/the-snooze-button-2/

http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2012/07/24/when-the-darkness-comes-2/

http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2012/07/20/other-people-2/

These were my reasons away back for starting to blog about me http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2012/07/11/hello-world-2/

I was doing 3 or 4 blogs a Month till January 2013 as I blogged here earlier, http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2013/08/27/official-1000-followers-here-are-my-badges-thank-you/

Now here I am, August 2013, the old me is gone, but the essence of the old me is returning, I can feel him, I am starting to have fun more, smile more, look forward more, anticipate things more, I found out at the Weekend my Mum is getting  Married early next year, things just started falling back into place in my mind, from the outside Dawn may see no change, but I do, and I guess Dawn does, I just am unsure what she see’s, we will talk about it, as she reads all these. I am in a good place, I have been for a while now, I have the odd day, I am a blessed man, living the life I want to live now, I want to be in no pain and do football, but anyone who followed my journey from the start will know I came to terms with that, so now I look forward to new challenges, new good things, challenges I may not even know about, I still want to do Radio, I want to improve as a writer by 100% at least, I am not a writer, I am just lad with a keyboard sharing his journey with a group of people who care, and I can only be thankful, I now want to help people who may be where I was once, this would make me happy, to pay it back, this is what life is about, giving back what you received

Like everyone here, I have issues, I have a journey, I am living it, but today I can say I am back in control, never again shall I blog this http://prayingforoneday.wordpress.com/2013/08/04/no-human-should-have-to-live-like-this-so-unfair/ I have my mind back, I have to thank 1,000  people  (some more than others) People came and helped me walk through the door, or over the line to where I stand today. But as said, my feet are on the ground, the journey carries on, and I can’t wait, I am up for the challenge of what life will throw at me now. This didn’t happen today, this happened over many days and weeks, today I just felt it stronger than ever for some reason, and my mind is now mine again, I say that loosley though, as I am a Scottish man, we are a different breed of Men, complicated I would say, along the way here on Word Press I never made 1 enemy, people may have made me an enemy, but I can say hand on heart, I feel no hard feelings towards 1 person, everyone helped me, so now it is time to pay back, I need to visit YOU and speak to you, and I hope this is ok

I would like you thank you all for joining me on my journey as I approach my 1,000th blog

As always, my blog, my rules, I had to leave a song 🙂

For anyone who doesn’t know, I will leave this, as I gain so many followers, many don’t know http://deliberatedonkey.wordpress.com/2013/07/02/murder-and-more-through-the-eyes-of-a-child/ But really, life is good now, all better, we are all happy as we can be, this was another life, one I had no control over. but I do now, I can decide to let it be what it is, the past, if it causes me issues, then so be it, I would say 2 year ago, maybe less, I WAS A MESS, I was on twitter, and I was gone, I tried to hide it, but in reality the medication was in control of a body I didn’t like a mind I hated, but here I am, look what I did, look what I achieved, I could have given in, but as I sit and write this I am published here http://www.broowaha.com/ a featured writer and Editors pick, I really did this? lol

long-journey-home-bryan-dubreuiel

 

I Refuse to grow up, here is why

I SHALL!!

I SHALL!!

 

When your a kid growing up you wonder what it is like to be a “grownup” I did, I remember being 8 or so, I was in primary 3 or something, my third year at proper school for anyone in the world who has a different way of being or going to school

And as I am a parent now (My blog a few down about letting go) I have to teach my kids about growing up, and it sucks, badly. I am a Man-Child, I point blank REFUSE to grow up. My last blog and the picture in this blog, kind of proves my point

As a child you worry about, well, Scooby Doo! As an adult you have, electricity bills, gas bills, petrol bills, bills for TV, bills for breathing and bills to pass wind, or so it seems, I pay bills for things I don’t even know what they are, something my partner did perhaps? I don’t know, I just pay it, so on the principle that growing up sucks, I hereby refuse to on grounds it is not fun!

So, I am not growing up, I am still going to be goofy and childish and if you do happen to want me, I will be in the fort I built above with my invisible friend Alan colouring in last nights evening news

So there!

Thanks

Shaun

I have no idea what this is, but Alan and I want one each, in Green!!!

I have no idea what this is, but Alan and I want one each, in Green!!!