I turned 40 years old a few weeks ago, I live in Scotland, a very Catholic or Protestant place, in-fact the West of Scotland is at War with itself over God
I have a relationship with MY God, a God I have seen perform things I could only attribute to God, there was no other thing that it could have been, I asked, it happened, so my God is good and I live my life as best I can to the 10 commandments, I believe if we all did it would be a better world
But let me share a few stories where the confusion starts for me
I have been blogging a few years now and I speak to many people from all over the globe, all corners and I love everyone I speak with as friends. Many are religious; this is where I get lost. A good friend of mine Bishop Eddie Tatro http://bishoptatro.wordpress.com/ gave me this to read http://www.biblestudytools.com/vul/ we started with Job and slowly we will take it from there, Eddie never preaches, if I don’t mention God or Religion we don’t discuss it, he doesn’t preach
Turn the coin around I had many chats with very preachy people, I do try and say “Please, in my own time, please don’t throw it down my throat” as I feel some can put people like me backwards in search of Jesus and a religion. I mean no disrespect, I ask for answers when I say this, Religion for me causes division. I see it at home here in Scotland and I see it all over the World. I spoke in Skype once with 3 others, one was Christian the other 2 were Catholic. I was raised Catholic, but as I got older I turned away, choice I called it. My Mum was not happy, but she respected my wished and knew I still spoke to God
Where I get lost is Jesus and all the things he is said to have done. For me it would take UTTER blind faith to believe in what he is said to have done. I am very scientific minded and proof is high up on my list; the reason I have God is I have what I call proof. For me to believe in what Jesus did or who he was would be a lie to myself and to God, so I can’t do it, it is a leap of faith at this stage of my life I can’t see, and when people say “If you don’t you will go to hell” and other stupid sayings, it puts me 2 steps backwards if you understand.
With Religion all I see is conflict, should someone reply to this article with anger, my point, for me would be proven. Why? Because I am showing love and compassion, why would anyone get angry? Sadly some do and when they do I take many steps back.
I see a World at War over the same God, just in a different name. So where does one start, what bible do I read? There are way too many for me, one Bible, one God and I truly believe we would have a better World. I have heard Catholics seriously offend Protestants and Christians have a real go at Catholicism, there are 10’s of thousands like me, and we are all in the same boat, we see division and War and hatred over God, why does Religion do this? If this makes you angry to read, am I now proving my point? Why be angry
I hope I can get discussion here and maybe, just maybe find an answer
More love, less hate
Shaun
Having little 2 little girls, as me and partner did, 4 years ago on Saturday for my oldest Daughter Courtney and 3 years at the end of July for my youngest Daughter Chloe was an amazing thing, the love these 2 bundles of joy have given us all has been nothing short of a miracle
They have both taught me more about myself, life and love than any 2 little people could ever do. Only something a Daddy could know. I have done a few blogs on Mums lately, and it got me thinking. I suffer from Chronic Pain Syndrome and it hurts me badly inside I can’t be Daddy all the time. I feel like old frail Granddad some days. I am in so much pain I just can’t play the throwing up in the air game at all and if I try the whole family worries, so I had to stop, the medication I am trying to stop, period, does not help, when on full medication Daddy is not Daddy, he hides away in shame
I can hold them and cuddle them, but little girls want to be throw in the air by Daddy and run at Daddy and jump on him. Some days I let them run all over me and jump on me and use me as a trampoline and a punching bag, it leaves me in pain, but a good pain, a worthwhile pain
Not being able to be Daddy destroys me to my core and upsets me more than the pain I suffer on a daily basis. The thought of “Were we right to have two babies” has came into our thoughts, but we didn’t know the pain was going to get as bad, and we rubbish this thought quicker than it entered our heads. I am speaking about Mummy and I here, I would not change a thing, and I just pray every day that god takes my pain so I can be Daddy, why doesn’t he answer? It is his will on me? Is he testing me? I have been tested, I beg you God, let me be Daddy before they become too old to want to be thrown in the air, I beg you God, I hope you can hear me, I ask every day, maybe tomorrow?
The more I sit here upset the more I want to just be Daddy and go through the pain, and I do some days, I just think “To hell with this” and let them hurt my body. They are 2 and 4 years old, they don’t understand Daddy is sore; my 4 year old is starting to notice things. They can’t pray to God, so here I am God. I am pleading with you to take my pain away so two little princess girls can play with Daddy, in the same way their friends can. Will you answer my call on their behalf? I will ask tomorrow.
I am thankful for having them in my life, for the joy they bring, for the light they bring to my darkness for the care they give me when they cuddle into Daddy to watch the Smurfs. I am thankful for all the moments I have had and will have, but I just want to be regular Daddy. I have had Dawn and many more tell me I am, but I don’t feel so. I get told not to be silly, I don’t think I am being silly.
I love as much as a person could, believe me on this one, I care as much as a person could, believe me. I pray sometimes and ask God to keep all my kids fit and healthy. They are loved, they get attention and all their grandparents spoil them also, as do their big brothers with their little sisters
But I want to be more than the Daddy I am, so for now, I will smile and be thankful for the blessings that I have. I say this often when I blog like this that Guilt follows. Some have lost their kids, I have mine, so I feel guilty for wanting a little more. Guilt comes to many people who have Pain in the way I have. I speak to hundreds who have this or Fibro and the constant theme is one of guilt. We moan while others have more to moan about or have less than we do
But I think to sum up here, being in pain, having a messed up mind, being on medication that could knock out a giraffe is hard. But others I know have it worse, so again with the guilt. I don’t want pity, I know God won’t answer my prayers today or tomorrow, I know I will never be able to throw them in the air, I have accepted it. By accepting this, I hurt myself, I get all sensitive and in touch with my feminine side I am told. But we all have a heart, I use mine. I just want more. Am I being greedy? Should I feel guilty and frown? Some days I know the answer, some days I don’t.
But, they will always be Daddy’s little girls x
“Sons of Scotland, I am William Wallace. And I see a whole army of my countrymen,
here in defiance of tyranny! You have come to fight as free men. And
free man you are! What will you do without freedom? Will you fight?”
“Two thousand against ten?” – the veteran shouted. “No! We will
run – and live!”
“Yes!” Wallace shouted back. “Fight and you may die. Run and you
will live at least awhile. And dying in your bed many years from now,
would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for
one chance, just one cahnce, to come back here as young men and tell
our enemies that they may take our lives but they will never take
our freedom!”
The two things above go back hundreds of years, this is why I feel it is relevant today
Above is an Amendment to the constitution of America; below in Red is a speech that till this day echoes through the hills and glens of my country. The one above is an amendment to a constitution that, in front of our very eyes is being ripped up and re-written, while the other one, in red, has an army behind it as Scotland is preparing to vote for REAL, TRUE, 100% independence., freedom, god willing!
The difference between the two could not be further apart. One is causing bad issues, the other may make my country free, and free from War, free from the War Machine that engulfs our world. Many say “When and if Scotland get independence, nothing will change” Well I am sorry, that is wrong. One of the reason we DEMAND freedom, most of us anyway, the true Scottish people, not the lovers of Westminster, is because we want free from War. The Scottish do not want War, we have our own factions of the War Machine up here, I have MANY friends serving in the Army and Navy and know a few that served in the Air Force, many of them want away from War, the hope is, should freedom happen, we will need to War Machine, why should we?
I know someone, somewhere will come back at me and say “It won’t happen” or “Scotland will still need an army” I ask why do we need an army? We are pacifists in the main, we dislike death and war, and I speak for myself and many of my people I know, not them all, we have our own issues in Scotland, but nothing we can’t solve on our own. No matter what the dictates, we will keep the monarchy, the Queen and her castles, some say this is a happy medium
Then I look over to America and I see a country very similar to the Roman Empire, the hand goes in the same place for the national anthem, need I say more, lol Isee a country on its knees, I see a people in fear, I see confusion all around, I hear all these conspiracy theories abound about what “Really” is happening in the States. Stories from corporate greed to a hostile takeover from within your own government, believe what you will, make your own conclusions. I don’t live there, I know many who do, I speak too many that do, and many are scared
The game has changed folks, your country has become a club, like here in the UK, We (The Scottish) are trying to leave the club, in the states, and the club is different. But you are not in it. They mess with your education system so much, soon all you will need is a pen and a smile to graduate and get in to College, it is sad sitting here and watching your Government harm you day after day.
I often get upset at watching what used to be the world’s super power on its knee’s, and printing monopoly money to get from one day to the next. I start this thread to REALLY ask the question to my American friends and family, and I just want to ask some questions.
Over here, we found out unmanned drones were flying from England to Afghanistan and we took this to them, the people who run the “Game”
And this is typical of the UK, We always go to the streets when unhappy, we say “No” do people listen? I don’t know, but we take to the streets anyway. The riots a few years ago caused a lot of issues here, but we were unhappy, so said so
Then I seen this:
Americans doing a Demo about the same drones, but listen to what the man says, he had a permit, and still the law went against him. He asks if the “Killing Machine” is to keep happening and say “NO TO THE GOVERNMENT, NOT IN OUR NAME” I said War Machine, he says “Killing Machine” I think over the pond, people are slowly getting it, I am glad they are, because the clock is running down, I see it more every day, every time I read something, every time I see a new law passed, it sickens me, and we can’t cover our eyes and sing “La La La” any longer, we need to act, we all do, again, with peace, peace will see the day through, I hope
So we can all demonstrate, I ask who does? Do you? Should you? I think if we all stood up, we would see a better world, the above video has 75 views, this is sad.
Let’s take our world back, let’s take to the streets and demand they LEAD FOR US not against us, let’s not sit and watch TV and feel happy inside, let’s educate ourselves on what is TRULY going on in our world, only you can do this. I do, and I know many others who do. Sadly the word “Conspiracy” gets said and we are all nut jobs.
I say we unite, I say we take to a street, in UTTER PEACE and ask “Why” and say “NO” and Demand that the people we vote in, act in our best interests and not for the best interests in the corporations who paid to get them into power, I don’t know about you, but what the UK and the USA do, stomp about the world as some police force, but deny these god given rights of utter freedom away from US in who’s name? Yours? Mine? No, they do it for themselves, to make money, war makes money, go Google Halliburton, and tell me I am wrong.
Let’s all stand up!
Question? The BBC News reported the UK side of things, did the US Media pick your demonstration up at all?
EDIT: Someone has already specified that it was Marathon Security on the roof, so I hear
All over facebook here. The picture top left, the 1st picture is the 2nd blast, the man on the roof appears to be nearer a roof from the first blast
The person could have good reason to be there. The person may not. This needs to get exposure, I am sure the police will know, but lets get this picture going through Facebook and Word Press. As I say, may be nothing, might be everything
Also hearing on most TV Channels here an 8 year old boy died and the Boston Kids Hospital is busy, this disturbs me and it will others. Put me in the path of these children. So sad
Also, why did this person start this Facebook page on Saturday? Someone asked “Why is there a page on this already” Then the page was down..How odd?
Shaun
prayingforoneday 